Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2015/Motivational control theory of cognitive fatigue

Heading casing
-- Jtneill - Talk - c 02:51, 2 December 2015 (UTC)

Book chapter resubmission comments

 * 1) Overall, the revised chapter is significantly improved, however it is also remains significantly flawed. The main issue remains the quality of written expression. In many places, the writing is difficult to understand as it often quite vague (e.g., "Biological and behavioural perspectives of motivation have yet been unable to attend to the perspectives of human experience in such a manner that is relatable." - What does this sentence mean?) or, alternatively, overly detailed.
 * 2) Many of the earlier comments still apply.
 * 3) The scope of the chapter is too broad; it goes beyond the topic as stated in the title and subtitle and thus fails to provide a cogent, focused summary of the target topic. An example of unnecessary content is the focus on critiquing observation as a research method - this is, at best, tangential to the topic. Other unnecessary content includes the author-created research study - better to focus on reviewing peer-reviewed and published research about the topic.
 * 4) This chapter is well over the maximum word count.
 * 5) Copyright restricted materials (including videos and images) were uploaded and re-used (e.g., https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2f8wL0r7Fh8). These have been deleted.
 * 6) Some links to Wikipedia articles were added as external links; these should be changed to internal links.
 * 7) The Overview is much improvement, however still fails to provide some key basics (e.g., What is cognitive fatigue? And what is the motivational control theory?).
 * 8) No citation is provided for the Fatigue Self-Test, thus this test have been reproduced without permission.
 * 9) There several problematic statements and claims (e.g., "should someone choose not to subscribe to Facebook, Twitter or Linkedin, they might as well have never existed in the first place.")
 * 10) There are several claims made without sufficient argument or evidence (e.g., "This relentless assault has taken a staggering toll on the mental well-being of society."). Avoid exaggerating. Strive to present an objective rather emotive perspective about what psychological science has discovered about the topic.
 * 11) Heading casing still needs to be put into sentence casing (i.e., only capitalise the first letter unless referring to proper nouns).
 * 12) Where using multiple citations, these should be in alphabetical order.
 * 13) The quiz doesn't contain questions about cognitive fatigue or MCT.
 * 14) Add bullet-points to See also and External links.

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 02:41, 17 December 2015 (UTC)

-- Jtneill - Talk - c 21:54, 2 December 2015 (UTC)

Multimedia resubmission comments
The MM recording was resubmitted, but hasn't been rewatched/remarked. -- Jtneill - Talk - c 02:49, 17 December 2015 (UTC)