User:CarrieBerg/The Bet

Down in fiery hell, where demons like to play

There were to low level devils that made a bet one day.

Mephistopheles said “I bet you can’t convert the holiest man of all

for how can the likes of you convince anyone to fall?”

To that Beelzebub replied “I am the very best!

If you doubt my powers, then put me to the test!

I will convert this holy man, and just to show you

I’ll do it only in a month or at most two!”

“Very well” Mephistopheles said, “But don’t forget the cost

If you fail it’s more that just you pride you’ll have lost

For if you lose then I’ll will get your powers too

And you’ll be left powerless, on Earth, with nothing else to do.”

Beelzebub just scoffed and laughed, she knew she always won.

And so she left for the mortal plane, it was time her work begun!

In a tiny village, three miles north of Rome

There lived the holiest man the world had ever known.

Little did the village, or for that matter the Earth

Know he was the world’s best liar and had been so since his birth.

Now this Roberto wanted money, and above all else fame

And so that was how he started his little game.

In a tavern in Rome, while talking to his friends

They suggested a way to have both money and fame in the end.

All he’d have to do, they said, was be holy

And he’d have both fame and money.

“I’ll do it” Roberto cried joyously out

But his friends just sat shaking their heads with doubt.

“Alright”, Roberto said, “you doubt me but you’re wrong

I’ll start a new life somewhere, you’ll have to come along

And see how I fool the people into thinking that I’m pure

As soon as they believe, I’m a winner for sure

For they’ll throw money at me, so absolve them of their sins

And you can take the money, so everybody wins.”

His friends like the idea, and so they headed out that night

Roberto dressed in rags, was not a pretty sight.

That had been half a year ago

That Roberto had started up his little show

And now the world believed that he

Was the purest of men, the most holy.

Up in heaven were the angels when the word got out

Of Beelzebub’s bet, and what it was about.

“Someone must save that poor man from

The tricks of Beelzebub that are sure to come!”

And so the angels conversed and chose a mighty angel to protect

The holiest of men, whom they did respect.

And so Raphael set up a hut not far from Roberto

To wait for the time when Beelzebub would show.

He made his looks similar to the holy one

And that was how Beelzebub saw him when he did come.

“Hello there!” called out Beelzebub, now a lovely maid

With long brown hair and eyes a deep rich brown shade.

“Hello” replied Raphael, unsure of what to do.

So far he had thought ten others had been Beelzebub too.

He had treated them poorly, only to find them to be

Regular humans, so he doubted himself, you see.

“I’m lost good sir,” the maid stated, with sad downcast eyes

Raphael was taken in, hooked by her lies

“Don’t fret, I will help you find your way”

He was hoping to undo some of the bad he did that day.

And so he helped the maiden and led her back to the village

She thanked him heartily and said she would visit his cottage.

Everyday for a month she returned to visit him

To bring him food in thanks, or sometimes on a whim.

Raphael grew to love her visits, and forget why he was there

Thinking more of the fair maid and her luscious brown hair.

At first Beelzebub cared so much of winning her bet

But after time, she too, started to forget.

And she began to think more of what clothes to wear

Or food that would please Raphael, when she went their.

Mephistopheles just smiled, watching it all play out

He had won from the start, he knew without a doubt.

For he had fooled Beelzebub into thinking that she

Was wooing Roberto, when in fact she

Was converting an angel. Oh what would heaven do

When they found out, what she was up too?

The Angel Gabriel had known Mephistopheles plan.

And knew what would happen, when this all began.

And so he’d chosen Raphael carefully

To be the angel that loses his divinity.

But he would not be lost without a fight

For Raphael would bring Beelzebub to the light.

And so after two months, the happy couple wed.

The thoughts of their old lives were throughly dead.

Raphael did not remember that he had been an angel,

Nor did Beelzebub remember she had been a devil.

Unseen by them at the wedding, were two other guests

They had not been invited, but they were impressed.

To see the two so happy, Gabriel couldn’t help by smile,

And Mephistopheles frowned after waiting for a while

“Alright,” he said angrily, “You win, you always do...”

“For once, dear Mephistopheles, you say something true...”

Mephistopheles and Gabriel had made a bet

To see which one could do the most powerful transformation yet.

Mephistopheles had transformed Roberto into a saint most holy

Through pretending and lies and sly trickery.

However Gabriel had bested him yet again

By turning an angel and a devil into human!

Gabriel transformed two hated enemies into lovers.

And it was good that Mephistopheles gained Beelzebub’s powers,

For when Mephistopheles groaned and paid the price agreed on

All his old powers were gone.

Gabriel smiled, and fly away

While Mephistopheles sulked for the rest of the day.

.:.:.:.:.:.

Why did I chose to make this tale? Simple really. I thought, “what tales are missing from the Canterbury Tales.” It seems to me that religious tales are few and far too dry. It would be right to add a humorous tale where heaven wins in the end. Since Chaucer never got around to writing the return tales, I decided to write one. This tale would have been told in the middle of the way back, halfway between the crude tavern and the religious experience that the pilgrims just had. They would still be reverent, and would perhaps have more faith, believing that God did know all, and that it was all part of His (or one of his angel’s) plan.

My inspiration for this tale came from several places. One source would be Bring Me the Head of Prince Charming by Roger Zelazny. The book centers on a Millennial competition between Heaven and Hell. Though my tale is more of a personal bet, there are touches of the book. A tiny taste of Faust can also be seen. After all, Mephistopheles does make two bets in this tale. So, like Chaucer I drew on other tales and gave them a new twist. Sadly, Modern English just doesn’t have the Rhyming capabilities that Middle English had, so I had to reuse rhyming words, which I don’t particularly like doing when writing poems. However, this was a long poem, so I guess some repetition is expected.

I did not have a set pilgrim in mind to read this tale. I figured that one of the pilgrims that Chaucer “forgot” to place in the Capricorn/Aquarius slot would read it. Of the existing pilgrims, someone from the Cook’s party (the Haberdasshere, Carpenter, Webbe, Dyere, or Tapycer) would work fine. After all, they are all the “forgotten” members of Capricorn. I hope you enjoyed the tale.

Should I explain the Capricorn comment? Ah, each group of characters on the pilgrimage takes after one of the astrological signs. The stories they tell reflect the humors/traits of that sign. I forget if the order is astrological based on the order they are introduced or the order they speak the tales... one of them does put them in order of the twelve signs. I could go into more detail here, but it would take far too long... and I'd have to dig out my copious piles of notes on the subject.